Let me start by stating for the record that I'm an Englishman. We English tend to have a pretty fatalistic view of life. We are much less likely to have the optimism and drive to improve things. An English man or woman is much more likely to say "oh well — that's just the way it is, better get used to it" rather than "that sucks — how can we fix it?"
So how do the English get through our gray, bleak lives? We laugh. We laugh at ourselves. We laugh at each other. We laugh at our problems. We laugh at pretty much anything — the darker the better. No subject is taboo. Think about the final scene in Monty Python's "Life of Brian" and you should have a pretty good idea of what I'm talking about. I'm not saying we're a funnier people, only that laughing at our problems is just about the only coping strategy that we have.
What I guess I'm saying is that my first 25 years in England left me well equipped to find something to laugh about in life, even in life with relapsing MS. (Disclaimer: the English do not have a monopoly on laughing at adversity — we just seem to have more material to work with.) It's not always easy, but if you can find some small aspect of what you are experiencing to laugh about, it can really help.
Having someone to laugh with definitely helps — much of the funniest comedy has come from double acts. What would Abbott have been without Costello? How about Laurel without Hardy? The other half of my comedy act is my wife. She never fails to laugh along with me. Oh wait, she's reading over my shoulder and has just informed me that she doesn't laugh with me, she laughs at me! She's lucky enough to be American, but I guess being married to me for fifteen years has given her more than enough opportunity to hone her ability to laugh at her own misfortune. In fact she's way funnier than me.
But seriously folks, only you and those close to you can find the humor in your situation. The stuff we deal with is way too unique and personal for others to write jokes about. Even if I was way funnier and smarter than I am I wouldn't presume to try it. All I can do is to leave you one example of something that brightened a dark day for us.
It was definitely not funny when I was first diagnosed and worried about one day needing to walk with a cane. But boy did we have a laugh when my wife suggested that if I ever needed that cane that I could get a top hat, tails and a monocle to go with it, just like Mr. Peanut!
This journal reflects the personal experience of one person and others can be different. It is best to contact your doctor to discuss what's best for you. Tim is an MS LifeLines Ambassador and has chosen to share his story with other people living with MS. MS LifeLines and MS LifeLines Ambassadors are sponsored by EMD Serono and Pfizer.
